Yep, I know. You were thinking it, you just never
wrote it. I got really busy BUT I still ran and
completed ALL my training, and I’m still alive (though
barely). I don’t want to spend the next 3 hours
catching up on the posts, so I’ll just give you a quick update
per week. Week Six-13.1miles Started crappy, ended well.
Basically I got up on Monday and decided I just couldn’t bring
myself to running, after the 6 miler on Sunday. So I
decided I would do it Tuesday, and on Wednesday, I would catch
up by doing a 2.5 mile easy run plus strength training. And I
did it, surprisingly. My shining accomplishment was spending
a total of 270 seconds in a plank. On the Saturday, instead
of having a long run, my training called for a 5k, but there was
not one race scheduled for that weekend. And there was a
“fire-weather” warning outside, so I decided to do my 5k on the
tread. This was pretty difficult to determine if I was going
as fast as I could, but either way, I completed it in 27:40.
According to my training
guidelines, this means I should be able to run the half
in less than 2:08 hours. Now, I’m not trying to be a Negative
Ne-Ne Nancy
Nelly but that would only happen if I switched my body
with that of “Speed Racers.” Also, I enjoy the
little things in life like walking and would like to be able to do
so after this race. S00000, I’m still keeping my goal at what
I think is reasonable. But I’ll keep that to myself to ensure
I won’t publicly fail. Week Seven-19 miles Now last week, I thought
that I had something going with this moving my Monday training to
Tuesday and coupling my Tuesday training with my strength
work. However, this week that plan sucked. By Saturday,
my legs were crazy on fire, and I was NOT prepared for Saturday’s
run of 7 miles, which is the “longest I’ve ever run.” Ps, you
might want to get used to that phrase because every long run I have
from here until the race, will be the “longest I’ve ever
run.” Anyway, I decided on Friday night in all my agony, that
unless I made some grandiose plan to run, it wasn’t going to
happen. So, at 1:30am I searched and searched until I found a
group of fellow runners with whom I could be accountable to with my
miles. So I headed out 7 hours later to meetup with 35
runners to head from George Washington Parkway to the National Mall
and back. After getting lost as I ALWAYS do in Virginia (I
hate driving in VA), I finally arrived with 1 minute to
spare. Immediately, two ladies walked up to me that looked
just as lost as I did and said “Are you new too?” and we
became running partners for the day. I found out quickly that
we had a moderately hilly route (just what my knees
needed…NOT!) and that their saying they ran about 10-11 min
miles, was a lie. Several thoughts went through my head
during that run. I’ll sum them up by saying I left it feeling
very unsure about whether I will be able to do a half marathon
EVER. Today my legs are in so much pain, my right knee
is in agony, and I want to throw a 3-year-old style
tantrum every time I think about having to run again
tomorrow. I don’t know if it was the change in schedule-run
Tue, Wed, Thurs, plus strength training, with only one rest day in
between. Or whether it was running the 7 and then
being convinced to do an additional mile back to the car by my new
buddy that really wanted to get 8.5 in that day. Or whether I
am just getting old. But I’m seriously doubting myself, and
it SUCKS SOOOOO BAD. 
I really need you
all to tell me everyone went through this their first time.
Or that when I wake up tomorrow, my knee will feel no pain
whatsoever. Or that there is a miracle cure that I can take
to make it all better. Ps, in my depress-ness, I ate a huge
chunk of Red Velvet cake, two cupcakes, two donuts, and an entire
Dairy Milk Cadbury bar this weekend. Which means that if I
don’t run tomorrow, I will have yet another dimple added to my ass
by Tuesday and my life will officially suck.
HELLLLLLLLP! An anonymous black girl who doesn’t like sucking
(I chuckled a little bit at that last line…it made me smile…but
now I am sad again…help!)
Ahem…I suck!
28 FebReek-ly WE-Cap, Week Four
7 FebWe interrupt this post to bring you the following message…
“Go Packers!” and with that I should follow-up with confessing I am not a Packers fan and football is not my cup of tea. The only thing I watched during the Superbowl was the halftime show. And I would say I watched commercials, but I actually didn’t see any worth noting in the 8 mins or so I had my Tv tunedFox 5. What I was able to catch on the net is the gossip about X-Tina singing The Star Spangled Remix. I just don’t understand how peeps can mess up that song. Like really? Is that the first time you’ve ever sang it? But what was most astonishing is when they panned the audience and it seems very few people were phased by it. So maybe she wasn’t the only one that missed singing that in school like weekly. If you didn’t catch it, check it out on You Tube. I thought about posting it here, but instead I figured we all could use a non-botched version of the song, so Whitney, Pre-Bobby Brown crack stage, take it away!
Now back to our regularly scheduled program already in progress…
Number of miles ran: 12
Workout thought for Monday: Now I know why I never remember Monday’s run…It sucks so bad that my mind erases it in an effort to convince me to run again. Not sure what was going on, but my feet were hurting like crazy and, all and all, it just sucked. Might have had something to do with the fact that I didn’t get a chance to eat much today. Gotta add to training schedule…eat on Mondays.
Workout thought for Tuesday: (blank) I skipped it. I know I am awful but I was performing and didn’t make it home in time to run without looking like the crazy lady who runs in the middle of the night. I was going to do it Wednesday, but I chose to come home and sleep. Gosh, am I now so old that performing warrants a 2 day recovery period? Really?
Workout thought for Thursday: Back to funky Fartleks, but the speed intervals were longer (.25 miles) and the recovery intervals (.1 miles ) were shorter. So I am putting it in the books as an improvement. My feet felt again!
Workout thought for Saturday: Treadmill running sucks kangaroo butt…Part Four! (insert explicit language) why does the weather screw with me this way? However, I found out that if I stick a towel under my portable DVD player, it will sit on top of the treadmill without skipping. Sooooooo, I watched my “What’s Happening” DVD as I ran. Did it make it easier, No! But at least I avoided obsessing in the mirror about the size of my thighs.
What’s on my I-Phone radio while running: Ciara Pandora Station again. Until Rihanna comes on. I kind of just want her to go away.
The song that saved my butt this week: On Thursday, while doing Fartleks, I had the unfortunate experience of having back to back slow songs on Ciara. Not bad slow songs but when you are in that last stretch, you really don’t need to hear “There goes my baby” by Usher. So I fumbled through the screen to change station, and there it was, just what I needed to get me through…Thriller. Thank you MJ! You ARE always with me.
Low moment: Skipping a 2 mile easy run. Who does that?
High Moment: Running the last .25 stretch of my fartleks at 8 miles per hour. And doing strength training afterwards. I had to redeem myself from the aforementioned low moment.
End of the week thought: Not my proudest week, but life goes on!
Hope all of your runs are going well!
An anonymous black girl who is really sleepy!
End of the week humor
29 JanOk, so I love snow, really. It is everything that is adorable. It’s light, it’s fluffy, and if you add corn syrup and koolaid, it’s downright tasty. However, I have to admit it’s not on my favorites list when it’s accompanied by thunder, lightning, and a windchill that would make you smack Mother Nature’s mama.
I mean, don’t get me wrong, I understand it is winter and these things happen. You get a scarf and some gloves, and a face mask, and hand warmers, and Uggs, and work it out. However, the problem is not the dropping beauty dust from the sky. It is the rugged version of it that sits on the sidewalks and roads for weeks and weeks. The gross brown stuff that eats through roads and dirties your newly washed car. And most importantly, that makes running outdoors deathly.
So in order to avoid the risk of getting hit by a car, or a flying tree branch, I am stuck in my illustrious G(ym), where the most fun I can have is counting the number of dirt stains on the carpet.
I will admit that I would be much worse if I lived in a place where this wasn’t normal, like this poor lady here in ATL. Apparently Atlantans don’t do COLD as seen in this video. Bloggers meet Megan McGlover. This lady is officially my new favorite person, and I’d actually watch the news if she was on it.
LOVE her! Hope you will too!
Happy cold A$$ running!
An anonymous black girl who despises snow banks
The first 3.5 mile run since August
27 DecThe stats! When: Christmas morning Where: My infamous G,
which was about 49 degrees still no heat! Why: Because I needed to
get rid of the overwhelming soreness in my legs from my first run
back (a couple of days before) What: 3.5 miles 35 minutes, not
including a 2 min warmup and 2 min cool down. Speed went up
and down but averaged somewhere around 5.5 miles per hour. I
think. What I felt before the run: Very stressed out and
lonely. It was xmas, I was at home alone. I was
annoyed. I didn’t like it. What I felt during the run:
Great. I actually kicked ass and realized that running in the
cold makes me run so much better. I could have gone at my
slower speed for at least 5 or 6 miles. I sped up in order to
make myself tired, so I had an excuse to stop. I had dinner
plans at a friends, I hadn’t seen in a while, and needed to get out
of the G and out of my depressing house. What I felt after the
run: Amazing. First time I’ve used running as
therapy. It made me feel 10 times better. Running
really is my boyfriend.
Desperate times call for…
28 JulCamp is killing my accumulated muscles. And the kids are encouraging me to eat AWFUL things.
My kids last week brought me cupcakes JUST because. Who does that? Such evil people they are. Then at the end of the week, I was invited to get italian ice, which is basically cellulite in a cup garnished with sugary goodness. And to top it off, they required that we get Outback Steakhouse prior to aforementioned cellulite in a cup. I counted, I consumed 3 billion calories last week.
So on Saturday my bottom booty called and said it wants to rejoin the rest of my body again. Poor bottom booty. With it being 102 degrees outside and 95 in the G(ym) with the broken AC, I decided to go for the lesser of two evils and headed to Satan’s sauna. I spent 45 minutes alternating cardio (dreaded treadmill at AVG 6.7 mph) with various muscle fatiguing torture. At the end of the workout, the treadmill was soaked with my sweat, so much so that I tripped and almost killed myself. I was so heated (literally) that I went upstairs soaked crotch and all and complained like mad to the building manager for three weeks of the A/C being broken in the gym. However, it was a great workout from which legs and arms are JUST recovering.
I plan to do those at last twice a week, three times when camp is on its alternate EASY teaching schedule. I am hoping this will prepare me for the torture that is RUN AMUCK, in addition to appeasing my bottom booty!
Hope you guys are enjoying your runs, and running a few extra minutes in my honor, especially those of you in cooler climates (ie NO ONE!)
laters!
An anonymous black girl who despises a sweaty crotch
Way too long
19 JulSooooooo you know how you realize that it’s been a while since you’ve done something and you really want to do it, but then you think it’s been so long that you don’t know what the hell to do, so you just wait expecting the perfect answer to appear and then it never does, and you keep waiting and one whole month passes.
Yep, that’s my excuse. I am VERY ashamed…
But there is more.
For the record, I HAVE actually run since my last post a month ago, but not as much as I would have liked to run. The truth is that every time I went out, one of my arms melted off and it took days for it to grow back. Of course, since I prefer not to run with missing limbs, I HAD to wait. Last time I headed out, I lost a nose and my right eyebrow, and figured I needed to reevaluate this whole summer running.
Anyone in DC knows, Satan has decided that hell was just WAY too far down for him and thus has relocated a few thousand feet up. I hear that when he considered where “up here” to relocate, the lure of living near the first black president must have drawn him in, and as a result…I am LIVING IN HELL! No kidding! I actually pass Satan and his other little devils everyday on the beltway. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
So I know you are like “well, what about your G(ym)?”. Welllllll, have I got a story for you. Two months ago we got all new managers in the office and since then, they spend their days attacking residents in the halls about paying rent (that’s not late) and avoiding the many reports they’ve received about the AC being broken in the G(ym). When it’s 96 degrees (feels like 105) in DC, a small a$$ room with two big windows, and NO circulation becomes Satan’s sauna and I REFUSE to exercise near his hot-mess-ness.
Ok, last and probably most acceptable excuse, I’ve been teaching summer dance camp 35 hours each week, coupled with 5 additional hours of teaching adult classes. And when I get home, getting out to run is NOT on the list of things I REALLY want or need to do.
So I have run about 6 days in the past month. Yep, the running gods are calling me a BIG OL’ WUSS and honestly, I am ok with that. However, my fanny is NOT! Nor will my knees be when I have to do the “MUD RUN” in four weeks. So I NEED your advice. What type of cross-training can I do that will give me the cardio I need, but will allow me to save my knees for my 40 hours per week required dancing?
In exchange for this advice, I give you a funny, or two. Haikus for YOU!
Sometimes I run and
sometimes I don’t, but who cares?
It’s hot than a bitch.
Ok, once you’ve composed yourself, another…
OK that was mean
I really do want to run
but it’s hot as sh!t.
(insert crowd roaring with laughter)
Ps, thanks for continuing to check in with me. I WILL visit all of your pages and catch up. I miss you guys WAYYYYYYYYYY too much!
laters,
An anonymous black girl who despises Satan’s decision to move to DC
Run Aborted
19 JunSo do you guys remember a post I did a while ago about fears of running outdoors? Well, apparently, someone in running heaven has decided I’ve reached that point in my journey where I MUST face all of my running fears NOW!
Two weeks ago, I had my first near miss with a car. UGHHHHHH! DC DRIVERS!
And, today, as I’m running on vacation in Connecticut…incident NUMBER TWO!
When I left the house, my aunt made a joke to the effect of “don’t call me to come pick you up”. I giggled and headed out. Within the first half mile, I realize I forgot to bring my pepper spray. I immediately got nervous because even though this is a really nice neighborhood, I haven’t seen ONE person running since arriving yesterday. I take for granted how many people run in DC. Because even though I DON’T really run alone, I know that if I did, there would be tons of people out there to make me feel safe. Apparently Connecticans haven’t seen the running light. So I felt kind of uneasy but decided to continue. However, I only put one of my earphones as a precaution.
First thing noted…damn it, there are a LOT of hills in CT, which might explain why no one runs there. Second, my leg has retreated back to that weird pain on the top of my foot, which I haven’t felt since I got off that dreaded treadmill. Not sure why it’s starting to act up again…ugh.
I knew it’d be a quick run. Literally, just needed to get out there to justify the cherry pie I was going to be eating for dessert. Is that snickering, I hear? Plus, I am a punk and yeah, not getting lost in an area I don’t know well. So was thinking 2-3 miles at most.
Anywhooooooo…as I was heading back, about .5 miles from the house , I saw the HORROR…
OK, this isn’t EXACTLY what I saw…not even close. More like…
but…times TWO, and without an owner in sight. I considered if I could just run in place until the owner came out to get their big s$$ dogs! Then, I considered if there was another route to get back to the house…but I thought, it’d be much worst to get lost (in the approaching dark) than to risk getting mauled by a pair of boxers. So I decided to just stop running and cry call my aunt to come pick me up.
It’s 2 hours later, and they are still joking about it. And if that wasn’t bad enough…it was discovered that the boxers were enclosed in an invisible fence. So had I kept going I would have been safe. Instead, I stopped short and sweated out the only workout clothes that I packed, for a 1.5 mile run waste of time.
Womp…womp…womp!
An anonymous black girl who despises unattended dogs, especially when they ruin my runs
On the road to recovery…
17 JunI got up this morning, and fought my way out of bed and to the park to join my group run. I hadn’t seen my run dawgs in about 2 weeks and I was sure I was getting my butt kicked. As a result, I spent 25 minutes hoping it would thunderstorm. It NEVER did!
I won’t go into a long sordid story about how I was partnered with a newbie runner that fed me her dust for 3 miles straight, or how my obliques and lower abs felt like Satan was taking a smoke break on them. The short version is, it was difficult!!! I did a little over 3 miles in 28:45 minutes, then at the command of my body, switched to intervals for 1.5 miles (alternating sprints 150 meters/walk 100 meters) for a total miles 4.55 in 47 minutes/average pace 10:23.
I can live with that! I also went to Ballet tonight. Jeez!!! The preparation for this new job is KILLING my body. However, it’ll all make sense when I step in to teach my first class. Those students have NO idea what’s coming their way.
In other news, my favorite trainer, Miss Angel Stone AKA my girl crush, is having a great discussion on her blog, Fit and Hungry, about why African-American women don’t statistically exercise as much as their fairer skinned counter parts. The discussion has stemmed from an interview she did on the founders of BlackGirlsRun. It’s a cool post. So when you get a chance mosey on over there and chime in. Then come back here and play with me, Ok?!
Toddle-Loo (I don’t think I’ve ever wrote that out, and am sure it’s not spelled right, but you get the point! If not, it’s synonymous with Laters! )
An anonymous black girl who despises having abs that look much stronger than they really are ={
Ouchie!
14 Jun
Is it possible to break an abdominal muscle? Wait! Are you laughing? Stop it! This is serious bidness…
Last Wednesday I went to the gym with a friend. We did about 30 mins of cardio (running on a treadmill, my favorite thing in the whole world…NOT!!!) When I got to my thirty minutes, of running in place in pure HEAT (WHY IS IT SO HOT IN GYMS) I was ready to jump off that damned torture device. She decided to move to 30 more minutes on the elliptical, so I headed for weightlifting. Started on the legs. I did the usual machines, though all the machines in her gym are souped up versions, I guess to justify the $90 a month membership fee. Then headed downstairs to work on arms and abs. Actually, I don’t really do much in the way of abs at a gym, as I work on abs everyday. But today decided to try the incline bench. 3 sets of 15 sit-ups on about a 45 degree incline. Actually wasn’t that hard…so I moved on and started arms.
They had these machines, I think they were called “Rock-Its” or something like that. They really didn’t feel to be working much but I thought it was super cool that as I worked, the machine moved. So I kept doing it, trying to go faster and faster. It was sooooo fun and reminded me of a ride at an amusement park. When I realized that I was having way too much fun and was doing virtually no work, I moved to working on my pecs and triceps. This, as usual, hurt.
Anyway, my friend finally came downstairs and asked me to help her with ab work. I totally stole some exercises with the ball from my sessions with my trainer. However, I hadn’t done some of that stuff in a while, so there’s a good possibility I didn’t do it right and even though I felt NOTHING while I was working with her, the next day my abs were SCREAMING! Actually, first it started in my chest that night. Any of you that have had kids know what it feels like when I say the soreness “felt like my milk was coming in”. For those that don’t know, trust me, it hurt like HELL!
The, next day, I went to class and tried to do my ab workout and stopped dead in my tracks. I couldn’t do ONE crunch. My students were looking at me in sheer disbelief. Very embarrassing when you are requesting your students to do 48 crunches and you can’t do one. Now one might say, “sounds like to got a good workout.” However, the fact that 4 days later, I still can’t sit up without rolling on my side…probably NOT so good! It literally feels like I’ve had a c-section. And even though, I don’t know what that feels like, I’m sure this is how it’d feel. Needless to say, I’ve gotten very little exercise since. Tried to convince myself to get up on Saturday and go running. Then realized that I rely a lot on my core when I run and I just didn’t feel the need to experience that pain. Tomorrow, I’m supposed to go to spinning…and am afraid, I might die.
Has anyone ever experienced this? And, more importantly, what do I do to make it better?
I want my mommy, NOW!!!!
Near-death experience…twice!
7 JunSo this is not a joke, I was almost taken out during my run on Friday and I am just getting my nerves up to speak about it! Well, actually, I got my nerve back ten minutes later BUT I have just been working ALL weekend.
I’ve almost been hit by a car about 3 times in my life, so you’d think I’d be used to it by now. But not so much. Long story short: End of my run that was going super well. Actually finished 4 miles in 38 minutes, which in 75 degree weather is GREAT, at least for me. The last part of the run, the dreaded hill, was trying. So I put on my headphones just to take my mind off it. I realize that people say you shouldn’t listen to music so much that you aren’t aware of your surroundings, and I wasn’t. I am a big chicken and run pretty defensively. I always look around, head up, volume down enough to hear bikers calling out, or cars honking, or dogs coming behind me searching for lunch. And the crazy thing is I saw the dumb a$$hole. (more…)
I’m a SITSTA SISTA
